Last week I was flying back from Boston and a recent business trip. While doing so, it’s quite common for me to catch up on a podcast or audiobook.
I happened to be listening to The Tim Ferriss Show and a recent podcast with Morgan Housel. This was of interest to me as I just wrapped up reading his book: The Psychology of Money. I love Tim’s longer form conversations as they get much deeper into a person’s feelings and beliefs.
Later into the podcast, Morgan said something profound. So profound in fact, that I stopped, hit rewind and listened to it again as I transcribed the thoughts into my notebook. Then I rewound again to ensure I heard it right!
What did he say?
He said, “None of it is profound, because there is soooooo much of it.” Now what was he talking about? Without me telling you directly, I decided to think about what could be on this list…and it’s rather long.
The News. It used to be once a day. Now with cable news it’s 24/7 and delivers the value of empty calories. Morgan asks, how profound would the news be if it was 1x per year? Rather meaningful right?
Luxury. If you think about it, luxury in America is all around us, but we’re so spoiled we don’t see it.
Rest/Relaxation. The goal isn’t to rest 24/7, although some think it is. Rest and relaxation are to be earned to be appreciated. A life without struggle isn’t worth living.
True Connection – Today it’s easier to connect with someone across the world than it’s ever been. And yet, true connection in society is more distant than it’s ever been.
Christmas Gifts – Yes, it’s that time of year to bless those around us with gifts. But do so with dozens, and they lose meaning. Chose wisely.
Information. There’s never been more information available. We don’t have an information problem. We have a discernment and action problem. When all information is important, we become paralyzed in execution.
False Beauty. Open your phone and you can find millions of photos perfectly posed and manicured for distribution and “likability”. Shredded men. Bikini clad babes. Everyone with a phone is a model.
More for the sake of more, leads us down a dangerous path. One I know I can be guilty of. Like a rich kid with infinite resources and a cocaine habit. Every hit, more unfulfilling than the last…but the chase must go on!
Where does this take us?
For me, it’s a reminder to do my annual retreat into the book Essentialism. Less but better. Fewer choices, well-executed create real value and meaning. Rid the mind of more for the sake of more, and instead be in a search for impact and vitality.
I’m going to make the assumption I’m like most of you, and I spend a fair amount of time on my phone. I’m digitally connected across many channels, all doing their very best to steal away my attention, and at the same time, sell my attention to advertisers.
In the last week or two I’ve been tempted with the following ads. All are brands I like, and some I devour. All are reasonable purchases I could make, almost in an instant. Here are a few examples:
Travis Matthew – 40% off Sale. Sounds like a helluva deal on essentially everything in my wardrobe. Almost seems too good to pass up.
Nike – Back to School Savings. Again, I’m a sucker for fresh pair of sneakers, so browse, browse away. New Jordans, Air Maxes, or running shoes. Sure! Golf Jordans?? Double check!!!
BYLT Basics – I love their t-shirts as they really fit a slender fella like me well. What colors could I add to the collection? Everyone needs a good t-shirt or two, or two more
Vuori Clothing – Haven’t purchased a single item just yet…but I’ve browsed about 100+
Rhoback – give me all the golf polos please and thank you! While you’re at it, throw in a few of those buttery soft hoodies too.
Wolf and Shepard – Again, I’m a sucker for shoes and I could easily see a pair of these in my closet. Equal parts sport and style. Just up my alley.
Ledbury – Best dress shirts I’ve ever owned. Period. And I’ve probably got 10 of them. Get yourself one. “Slim Fit” if you’re built like me.
Target – I don’t even know what I was looking at other than maybe some new kitchenware (sexy I know), but who can’t drop a quick hundo at Target?!?!?
At some point amongst my scrolling, a wave of clarity came over me and I zapped out of the fog. It was almost like a cool breeze you feel in the fall when you realize the temps have turned from a warm Southern breeze, to a cool North wind. What the hell was I looking for?
Let me say this again. What was I looking for?
I feel very comfortable saying this. I could easily purchase any one of the brands noted above, or even spend $1,000 on a digital shopping cart full of “new gear” today. It won’t change my life. I’ve thought of buying a Rolex numerous times to reward myself for a sense of accomplishment and as a symbol for achievement. Will it make me happier? No. Does it tell time better than my Apple Watch? No.~Side note, pretty powerful brand story for me to make the achievement associationwith a watch. Quite fascinating really!!
Spending $100 or $1,000 or $10,000 is incredibly unlikely to make me happier. It won’t change my life. It won’t elevate my position with my family, it won’t make new friends or make the current ones I have like me more.
Disrupt the Comfort Channel
Fifteen years ago I lived by myself in downtown Chicago. On weekend strolls, I spent a great deal of time walking in and out of stores on the magnificent mile. Every notable brand wasn’t only available, it was at my fingertips. Young and ambitious to a fault, I would often go on ‘lifestyle seeking expeditions’ for the person I was striving to become. What did the wealthy wear? What did they drive? Where did they live? Where were they eating? It was all very tempting to the senses.
What I was able to learn on these walks, was 99% of the time, I was able to intercept the need for comfort or status and I bought NOTHING. I was able to go through the entire cycle of imagining, finding an item, maybe even trying it on in a dressing room or touring an apartment, and then asking myself the most notable question anyone can ask…
Do I really need this?
I’m not a monk. I want to drive a Ferrari, eat filet mignon and play Pebble Beach.
I’m not holier than thou and I’m a “consumer” in every since of the word, living in a capitalist country with sizable marketing budgets available to grasp my attention. What a beauty to be free right?!?! That said, I can intercept the signal and still appreciate living in a nice house and driving a nice car. Take them away tomorrow, I’m still who I am.
Who owns who?
Do we own the things around us, or do our things or the pursuit of things own us? I will buy more Jordan sneakers. Someday I may purchase that Rolex. But I won’t associate a false level of happiness to such a meaningless thing no one will care five, or especially 100 years from now.
“How good it is when you have roast meat or suchlike foods before you, to impress on your mind that this is the dead body of a fish, this is the dead body of a bird or pig; and again, that the Falerian wine is the mere juice of grapes, and your purple edged robe simply the hair of a sheep soaked in shell-fish blood! This should be your practice throughout all your life: when things have such a plausible appearance, show them naked, see their shoddiness, strip away their own boastful account of themselves. Vanity is the greatest seducer of reason: when you are most convinced that your work is important, that is when you are most under its spell.”
The outpouring of responses from my latest post was intense in the best of ways. I had a very strong suspicion there were many others out there like me, experiencing the same [bottled up] feelings I had two years ago. What I didn’t know, is I’d hear from so many of you in droves. You are brave for reaching out and trusting in me to have the conversation!
THANK YOU!
In case you missed it, this is the post which sparked overwhelming response: My Journey with betterhelp.
I received this message from a friend I haven’t heard from in some time. I was instantly moved and felt connected. Here is a selection,
“Either way, thanks for posting that and in a weird way its a relief to know that I am not the only one going through it, but I also don’t like seeing people go through it either.”
I received DOZENS of messages like these
Lets be honest. I don’t have the reach of internet sensations: Tim Ferriss, or Rich Roll, or Brene Brown. I figured I’d receive a text and email or two from the post (because I almost always do), but the responses came pouring in and they came in almost immediately. In my nearly 10 years of blogging and sharing my perspective, I’ve NEVER gotten the feedback like I did here. Nor have I felt the instant gratitude to start conversations with people I connected with throughout my life.
I decided to anonymize those who sent feedback to show you what I already believed to be true. Many men are walking a similar journey and had similar stigma around getting help. Some have a history of struggle. Some are in it right now. But all have found a way to seek guidance or hear another voice…besides the voice in their head. If you reached out to me, here is a snippet of what your peers had to say! They appreciate you without even knowing it!
A Friend, an athlete, a great Dad
I read your post regarding therapy. I commend you for doing that, it’s not an easy thing to do much less post about it on your social media. I have been on again/ off again with therapy/ meds for anxiety and depression. A lot of the causes resonated with me because those are some of the same things that reared their ugly head when I was going through it/ still going through it. Either way, thanks for posting that and in a weird way its a relief to know that I am not the only one going through it, but I also don’t like seeing people go through it either. I am glad you got out of therapy what you did and are on the other side of it. I am still working through it, but therapy has helped.
A friend, a peer, a great Dad
Good post brother! I’ve met with Aaron Kampman quarterly for the last several years. https://www.thealignprocess.com/aaron-kampman From a mental health standpoint, it is freeing. For me, weight lifts off my shoulders after each session.
A Business Peer
Loved your post Zac. Thank you for your honesty and the courage to put yourself out there for others who may be feeling similarly or the same. I think many of us were/are in a similar boat, but as men, we typically are the last ones to seek out self-care, especially when we have others to care for who come first (wife/partner, child, parents, etc.) I know that’s the challenge I struggle with daily.
A friend, and a rebuilding story
Great post tonight! It hit home for me. It took going through a divorce, therapy, and a lot of self-reflection to get me back to my true self. The toughen up and push through it mentally doesn’t work, and it really just fuels anxiety to the point of changing who you really are. Being vulnerable is where it is at! Thanks for sharing!
A successful business associate, peer and Dad
I’m reaching out because I wanted to let you know that I saw your post about your journey with betterhelp, and I wanted to say THANK YOU for posting that! I’ve been struggling with certain things as well, predominantly professionally, and that post caught me at the exact right time!
A friend, business associate, and great Dad
Love the blog. Thanks for sharing. One of my favorite quotes…Calmness of mind is one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom. It is the result of long and patient effort in self-control. Its presence is an indication of ripened experience, and of a more than ordinary knowledge of the laws and operations of thought. ~James Allen, As a Man Thinketh
As I was sweating through a Peloton ride this morning, my session ended with Emma Lovewell saying this,
When we show up for ourselves, we have the ability to show up as our best-self for others around us
Last week I was in Chicago for a host of meetings with clients, a Holiday Extravaganza and a Basis Holiday party. By the way, I get the “Holiday” thing, I’m just not used to it. I want to say Christmas Party and it isn’t because I want to offend anyone.
Anyway as I stray from the path of this post, my travels encompassed a few days of eating out, coffee, lunches, cocktails, and a couple late nights (add karaoke). All this sent me traveling back home feeling puffy (inflamed) and needing a good night of sleep. For me, this is a BIG DEAL!
Coincidentally, I stumbled upon this YouTube Video from Jocko Willink with guest Tim Ferriss. Please watch.
“Never Stray from The Way” – from Miyamoto Musashi.
It is the path of discipline and discomfort, but it is the RIGHT path.
Get on the Path. Stay on the Path
You might be asking, what was really different from last week’s travels to this week? I’ll tell you.
DIET – I follow a pretty regimented diet. I won’t say entirely strict, but my time at home almost always includes at least one smoothie a day (Purple Smoothie for breakfast), and most days two smoothies. It’s a simple and efficient way for me to consume a ton of fruits and vegetables while maintaining a good diet.
EXERCISE – My current rhythm calls for 5-6 days of working out a week. In Chicago I was as effective as the Buffalo Bills in the Super Bowl. (0-3). Zero Peloton rides. Zero push ups/pull ups. Zero runs.
MEDITATE – I try and hit at least 1x per day at home. Some days I hit two. When I was traveling I also couldn’t get off zero.
SLEEP – It shouldn’t be a shock, but when the three key elements above are met, I sleep well. Not meeting usually I don’t get a restful night of sleep. Anecdotally, mix in a little alcohol and a late night Karaoke session and quality sleep isn’t likely to follow that recipe either.
The elements noted above are the north star guiding my compass to keep me progressing on the The Path. I find this similar to the work I’m doing while reading “The Warrior Book” by Garrett J. White and his Wake Up Warrior Movement. Garrett’s path for all warriors is to “have it all” by mastering: Body, Being, Balance and Business through a focused daily practice.
I know my Path. Following it is entirely about discipline.
Following The Path does three powerful things for me.
It’s a Reset when I’ve strayed from the things that give me the most vitality (usually to a state of low energy)
It generates tremendous momentum. Stacking days on the path leads to a vitality and vigor
This personal view also doesn’t account for those things that drive success in my business life or my role as a husband/father. But it does help me show up as the best version of myself.
My ask to any and all readers is to find your path. Be intentional with your efforts and time so you can deliver your best self to all other elements of your life.
This is just like the instructions a flight attendant gives you if/when oxygen masks are deployed during flight. PUT YOUR MASK ON FIRST!! If you can’t give yourself oxygen F-I-R-S-T, your ability to help others is irrelevant. The Path is our oxygen to help ourselves and others!
I’m fortunate to be “off” the next 11 days, and I look forward to owning my Path and catapulting myself into 2023.
When I started out in my working career I’ve always thought very intentionally about retirement. You know, that mythical creature we’d all hope to reach by the ripe ole age of 65!! I might look something like the picture above (PS – Thx Snapchat Filter)
I began as most do, with an employer sponsored 401K and began socking away money for a day that “could be” 40+ years from when I started. Initial learnings of OPM (Other People’s Money) became apparent as my contribution was “matched” by my employer. I supplemented this work 401K plan with a ROTH IRA contribution. Post tax dollars invested for a similar “someday” but these dollars would not be taxed as they grew or when they would be redeemed. Decent start for someone early in their 20’s…or so I thought.
All that seemingly remained to accomplish my goal of retirement would be to:
Continue to grow earnings & investing with consistency over time
Reduce expenses and debt (this almost always makes sense)
Hope the market continued to grow as it had the last 90+ years
Don’t die…
Don’t Die?
Killer Strategy (no pun intended!). When saving for “Someday” the importance of don’t die took on a new light when I got into my 30’s and continued growing personal income. I began to question the ideals behind saving and investing (buy, hold, pray) during the best years of my life, so I could retire somewhere in Florida to ease my arthritis and work on my shuffleboard game in my 70’s at a measurably slower pace of life.
The goal isn’t to stash away money for 40-50 years so that some day when I’m 75 and have limited mobility I can be as free as a bird (from expenses). It takes too long!!! What if I wanted to retire 10 or even 20 years sooner? How could that happen?
Mindset Shift
Through an introduction of some terrific business friends, I read, listened to and re-listened to The 4-Hour Work Week, by Tim Ferriss. The “new rich” as he’d described saw retirement not as the end goal, but more a means of being throughout life. Scheduled “mini-retirements” were necessary to live life to the fullest now vs. saving it all for a future someday (the end). This began my learning journey of my 30’s.
Concepts like: Business Ownership, Monthly Cash Flow, Time Management and Target Monthly Income (TMI) became common place in my retirement planning while learning from the “new rich.”
The Rich Don’t Work for Money
I dove back into the classic Rich Dad Poor Dad and the classic teaching from Robert Kiyosaki. I started asking simple questions of the wealthy. How did they get there? What do they do? More importantly…what do they OWN?
Assets like a 401K, IRA, or Roth IRA weren’t accessible until 59 1/2 years old (without substantial early withdrawal penalty) and they’re subject to high tax. As I grew in my knowledge, I also became more aware of taxes on the impact of wealth creation and wealth preservation. Would taxes likely be higher 30 years from now….I’d venture a strong HELL YEAH, at this one!
I’m an incredibly visual person and so at 38I drafted this visual to unlock the answer to the question,
“What would it take to retire at 45?”
What would it take to require at 45?
Pretty simple answer. Produce monthly cash flow from investments that exceeds > current expenses. Period. End of story. Invest in assets which produce cash flow. [From: Rich Dad Poor Dad]
There’s a critically important point to make here. I’m 99% sure I won’t retire at 45 to a john boat, weekly fishing expeditions, morning coffee with the boys, and afternoon golf (daily). But, that doesn’t sound too shabby does it?
Back in 2013 I started what I call “Dream Bucket 2027” which is my plan to freedom at 45 years old. I sometimes interchangeably call this mission the “Freedom Fund” as I’m talking about it and investing in assets.
Familiar with the F.I.R.E. Movement?
Financial Independence Retire Early. If you’re not familiar with Mr. Money Mustache, this would be a good side track for you and another POV on early retirement if that’s the mission you’re on. His “mustachian” philosophy is that of aggressive saving and passive index fund investment and aggressively limiting and/or eliminating expenses for financial freedom. Different path, but similar destination in mind.
Where do we go from here?
Today I continue investing in cash flowing assets (primarily real estate) and I feel well positioned given the recent explosion of inflation. I’m also doing a great deal of learning about TAXES and how the wealthy navigate this space (legally)to keep more of what they earn. If you’re wondering why the wealthy don’t pay taxes, consult the IRS Tax code. The tax code is simply a series of “incentives” from the government. The wealthy understand how to use the code. Tom Wheelwright does a terrific job with his TAX FREE WEALTH books and content on this subject.
Nothing Happens without Income Growth
I’m certain there are differing opinions here, but I’ll make this very simple. The first step to any retirement or freedom journey is to MASSIVELY increase your income. A person can live very comfortably and with large steps forward with their income many options will become available. I recommend following Grant Cardone for income explosion inspiration and concepts. I’ve read a few of his books and they’ve been helpful on my journey.
As I move from my 30s to my 40s in 2022, I look back at all the learning I had in my 30’s and how different it was from the learnings of my 20’s. I’m looking forward to further mindset shifts in my journey and I look forward to updating the readers on my DREAM BUCKET journey.
This “go-to” smoothie is nearly a daily occurrence for me! Tom Brady has a similar blend for his favorite TB12 Blueberry smoothie recipe.
My son calls it, “The Purple Power Smoothie” and it’s a staple in the Keeney house usually 4-5 days a week for breakfast. After refining and testing my concoction, I thought it had a definite “Peanut Butter and Jelly” taste…which is A-OK by me!
When complete, this smoothie will be cool or cold, but not icy frozen and definitely smooth with a pleasing and vibrant purple appeal.
I grew up eating cold cereal most days of my adolescent and early adult life. My go-to was either Peanut Butter Capt’n Crunch or Honeycomb. By the way, if you’ve never mixed them…its the BOMB!
Over the years and as I get older I find my body reacts better to a little more balanced breakfast complete with more fruits/vegetables and protein (and less sugar!!!!). This balanced start also helps prevent me from the mid-late morning sugar crash!
This smoothie whips up in only a couple of minutes via our NutriBullet. A couple pours, a couple scoops and blend away! Tim Ferriss often asks guests on his podcast for their most valuable purchases under $100. For me, the Nutribullet has to be on the list…if not at the top. We’ve made hundreds of smoothies and it shows now signs of stopping soon. (I hope I didn’t just jinx it by writing that)
Ok, now to the punchline…the recipe. Please note I’m not the best measurer of ingredients. But the good news is, I’m an excellent estimator!
Purple Power Smoothie Ingredients (& estimates)
Frozen Blueberries (Hy-Vee Brand)- about a cup +/-
Almond Milk (Silk Almond Milk) pour to top of frozen blueberries
Peanut Butter (Creamy Jif)- a hefty/oversized scoop (tablespoon…I guess?). Be sure to lick off the excess!
Honey Greek Yogurt (Currently Chobani is my go to) – two hefty scoops plopped into the blender
**Banana – Sometimes I’ll add a ripe or overly ripe banana.
**Avocado – Similar to a banana I may add in an avocado for healthy fats
I use the larger of the two NutriBullet containers for my daily smoothie. It’s enough to make a good sized portion for my son and I to enjoy (about 16-20oz total).
I’m neither a dietician or a nutrition expert, but here’s what I gather is in this bad boy.
This smoothie contains over 40g+ of protein. It’s packed with antioxidents, vitamins and minerals. The Spinach and Chia seeds are heart healthy and are sneaky ways to add in vegetables and nutrient dense foods.
The next time you spin your blender, give this recipe a try and let me know what you think of it.
I despise starting over. But beginning Feb. 26, 2021…that’s exactly where I was.
I spent that cold Iowa Friday night with some friends on the golf simulator at our golf course. A few too many beers and a few months of COVID (family, business, life) stress led me to making a decision I knew I’d regret as I’d spent years staying clear of it.
I’d chew tobacco again. But it wasn’t really that I’d chew again that specific night, it was more that I’d been doing a lesser version of this same habit (Camel Snus) for a few months in 2020 and most importantly – – – – > hiding it from my wife. But this night it was the real stuff and it was placed directly against my gums…and it tasted G-R-E-A-T. It was sending ALL the signals to my brain I knew I’d have to fight on my hands…tomorrow.
The next day I was filled with a poor night of sleep and a titanic-sized boat load of shame with my family. I was starting over and I knew what the addiction battle that lie ahead looked like and that I needed to rebuild my body and health.
The prognosis was simple: two weeks of hell followed by bits of progress and commitment. But the good news is I’d done it before, and that was the silver lining.
Let me rewind.
I quit chewing in 2011. I know this because I kept a diary my first 100 days of quitting. Sept 12th was my first “Days Upon Days” email to myself (I’ve shared these with no one). I’d slipped up two days prior to writing this message. I was watching the Iowa vs. Iowa State game in 2011. It was a 44-41 overtime thriller and one of the last times in a decade Iowa State would beat Iowa (sorry, couldn’t resist Cyclone fans). I was six days into my quit and I’d given in. I was at my friend’s parents house (Kalli you’ll remember). Here’s proof of my first email to myself.
The following week would present the same challenge as the week before. Tailgating. Make it past seven days. Eventually I did, and continued to write about my journey the whole way, past day 100 and beyond. If I’m ever deep in a challenge, I relate back to these messages to understand what I’m capable of taking on, and what real perseverance looks and feels like. It starts as pain, and ends in progress.
At this moment in my own personal reflection, I’m quite certain you’re asking yourself, “Why is he telling me this?” “What is it about this story that needs to be shared now?”
I’m sharing because I’m staring to embrace the concept of starting over and energy of the rebuild. I’m making a game out of it.
Life isn’t a straight line and people make mistakes. God knows I’ve made my fair share and I’m sure I’ve got more waiting for me.
Most importantly, I know people this very moment struggling and battling with a variety of similar challenges and they’re all MEN I respect. I’m talking with some men daily and others weekly as they work to make progress in their journey. They’re all in different phases of the rebuild and “starting over” from any one or two of the things listed below:
Anxiety
Depression
Alcoholism
Stress from Business Collapse
Addiction
Marital Issue
Combo order of elements above (add two, shake and scream)
I’m sharing this for my friends, colleagues and peers to know they’re not alone. Everyone is dealing with some shit. The rebuild isn’t humiliating. It’s an empowering challenge. And although it may suck now, it doesn’t have to suck forever. There is a way through and it’s actually incredibly mobilizing with momentum.
Dealing with stress, or anxiety, or addiction doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human. Everybody’s got something. How do I know? Listen to this podcast with olympian Michael Phelps (23 gold medals) talking through his struggles. Tim Ferriss Show Episode 494. Michael Phelps now famously stated, “It’s OK, to not be OK!”
I love that. It’s OK, to not be OK!
If you’d like more mental resources, here is another I recently feel in love with from Rich Roll and David Goggins. Start your watch at 1:46:38 when Rich says, “Then it becomes about Willingness…”
Lastly, Rich says the following: “We’re in a culture that is driving everybody toward this idea that happiness is purchased through luxury, comfort and ease. And the truth could not be more different from that reality. If you want to find peace with yourself, self understanding, self knowledge, self esteem, all of these things are going to be found through: sacrifice, getting uncomfortable, re-evaulating what your normal is and putting yourself in situations you don’t want to f*cking do”
“Rich Roll Podcast – Episode 413”
~Damn Rich. Love this! Thank you!
One last thought I’d like to share is, “Be weary of the quick fix.”
I know I’m guilty of wanting answers and progress immediately in life, especially in times of struggle. But that’s just not likely, nor will the results stick. Results have to be trained in with habits. Good habits.
I’m reminded of lottery winners who win tens of millions in a jackpot…then go broke. Why on earth would a lottery winner go broke!?!?! Because they didn’t have good money habits in the first place. The money was transient. The habits won out. They’re broke again.
Today upon publishing this piece it’s Oct. 7th and I’m feeling really great. My body and mind are in an entirely different place than where they were six months ago. Looking back I was broken, body inflamed, stressed and tired. I still feel the temptation, and I will continue to, but that’s ok. I’m aware and being aware is the shit!
My habits are also in a different place. I’m on a mission to knock out 3,650 pull ups this year (10 per day). It’s a feat I gave up on in 2020 and only amassed 1,400 before quitting. I’m proud to say I’m nearly at 3,000 and I’m gaining momentum every day. Three months ago I started running again to get a good sweat in and free some mental space. I still don’t like running, but I love the cleanse of a good sweat.
(Good/Bad)Habits win over time!
Choose your habits wisely.
If any element of this post hits with you, I’d share with you one final quote,
Henceforth, I will consider each day’s effort as but one blow of my blade against a mighty oak. The first blow may cause not a tremor in the wood, nor the second, nor the third. Each blow, of itself may be trifling, and seem of no consequence. Yet from childish swipes the oak will eventually tumble. So it will be with my efforts of today
You get to the end of the day, and you’re wiped out. Just. Plain. Tired. Your brain might as well be mush. Why am I soooooo drained?
You may even be a touch irritable and you can’t exactly pinpoint why? Why do I feel this way? What did I do today to feel this way?
I’ll challenge you to think about the question of feeling…with a twist. Gain perspective into WHO time is spent with vs. exclusively WHAT you’re spending your time on.
Recently, I was listening to Jim Collins, a guest on the Tim Ferriss Show (episode 361). Jim Collins, author of Good to Great, Great by Choice, and Built to Last, keeps a daily +/- spreadsheet log based on how he feels from that day’s efforts. Personally I find this very interesting as I’m always trying to tune into just how I feel about a meeting, situation or encounter.
Back to Collins and his spreadsheet.
Jim’s daily scoring goes as follows [-2, -1, 0, +1, +2]. A score of +2 is a great day, +1 is a good day, 0 is a ‘meh’ day, -1 is a net negative day, -2 is a bad day. He then sorts his spreadsheet, looking over long periods of time, does more of the things that cause a +2 day and fewer of the things that cause a -2 day.
He pays attention to those things that give him energy and positivity.
This is where I offer the reader a plot twist. Jim pays deep attention into where he spends his time. My parlay to that bet isn’t inclusive to only WHAT time is spent doing, but looking to the additive (or subtractive) nature of with whom?
Everybody knows an energy suck!
Energy sucks are largely unavoidable and come in different forms. If possible, the goal is to avoid these people at all cost like a root canal. No one goes looking for a root canal nor do they enjoy the hours in the chair.
The Ego Monster – These energy sucks take, take, take, because they are the black hole to conversation. Everything in the end, is swallowed up by them and is about them. I’ll add “toppers” to this group as well. You did something? They inevitably did it BIGGER and BETTER. Heck, might as well throw the “assholes” in here too!
Negative Nancy – Name says it all doesn’t it. The perfect cloud for any sunny day. Run forrest run from negative Nancy. She has a sister as well. Saturday Night Live did a skit for her titled, “Debbie Downer”
No-Mo-Joe – This person is low energy. Low drive. Low ambition. Hang around them and I’m certain you’ll feel sleepy too. Don’t worry too much about what can be done better, the world happens entirely to No-Mo-Joe and there isn’t much to be done about it.
The Stressor – This unique group is habitually worried about worrying. Although they may seem like a Negative Nancy on the surface, they really are just anxious about being anxious. Careful as this could rub off on you. I can’t think of a long list of people satisfied with being more anxious.
This is when I like to take a step back and think of a few of the most EPIC energy sucks I know. We all have them. I smile ear-to-ear thinking about how little time I spend with them anymore.
Now, the inevitable question must be asked. Zac, “What if I can’t avoid the energy suck in my day? I work with them. Or better yet, they’re family!!!” The answer is simple. Limit interaction. Be brief. Get what you need and don’t be sucked in. Your energy level will hate you for it. As tough as it sounds, it’s the right thing to do.
Be on a mission to add energy to your day.
I’m personally much more in tune to how my day is scheduled and WHO it is scheduled with. If I know I’m going to run into a couple back-to-back energy sucks, I’ve got to plan a rebound call or chat with an energy builder. It’s as simple as more (+), and less (-) every day. I won’t be perfect, but if you read anything I put out, I’m very bullish on momentum. Momentum builds up and tears down. Be a builder.
Who are energy builders?
Energy builders bring a smile to your face just by hearing their voice
Energy builders add value and stimulate deeper conversation with you
Energy builders talk about ideas and progress, not people
Energy builders challenge you to think bigger, take more action and live bolder lives
Energy builders ask thoughtful questions and engage you by listening to what you really have to say.
I’m incredibly fortunate to have a ton of energy builders I can connect with. Some are family. Many are close friends. Some are clients past and present. Each has their own recipe to build me back up and getting me moving toward progress again.
As I close on this topic, pay close attention not only to how you’re spending your time, but WHO you’re investing that time with.
For those looking for the final plot twist here it is. As you complete reading this post, be on the lookout for energy sucks. Also, it needs to be abundantly clear. Whose list are you or I on?
I took a few months off to evaluate the direction of a few things in my life and this blog was one of them. To be completely candid with any of you readers, I wanted to know if it would be missed. Spending 50+ hours a week running a national media agency, trying to be a good dad & husband, time with friends, etc. All hours need to be evaluated.
Again, would the blog be missed?
If it wasn’t, or no one brought it up in 90 days, I knew a couple things. One of them was I wasn’t really impacting the lives of my tribe. In all reality, there wasn’t really a tribe if there was no appetite for consuming the content. Removing emotion from these findings was going to be key. My Ego wanted the work to continue, but we all know Ego can be quite the adversary.
Secondly, I needed to recommit. Commit to continued ideation and thought sharing. Commit to pushing myself into new thoughts/ideas/strategies. Commit to sharing the ideas and impacting lives of my readers. In the end, that’s what it is about. Impact. Even if it is just one person.
I have this fear deeply ingrained in our office culture. We are a tight knit group, and If we part ways with a team member, or visa versa, my biggest fear is the following day…everyone moves on. They’re not missed. You need a team, a culture, a product that if removed…there is a void. Otherwise, you didn’t have anything to begin with and the end is near.
On another related topic, I had a friend tell me I should start A Keen Mind podcast. Can you imagine listening to episodes of my boyish voice?!? Still evaluating that idea. To be totally honest…I’m really in love with it, because i think my talents are better suited for audio and storytelling than writing. That, and one of my favorite “jobs” would be sports talk radio host. Why not do it on my won, with the format I choose?
I actually considered turning the primary driver of the blog into podcast form. However, as I’ve said before in learnings from Derek Sivers (founder of CD Baby), if it isn’t a “HELL YES”, then the answer is “No.” I’m still evaluating.
PS – If any of you have strong feelings on this topic, please share honestly with me. Good or bad.
In the downtime I also took the time to consume some new content. A couple pieces specifically impacting my current mindset are:
As a Man Thinketh (audiobook) – 55 minutes of simple, yet, deep thinking
The Joe Rogan Experience – This guy’s commitment to his show, his craft, and the litany of guests/topics is energizing. I’m listening every morning to 5-10 minutes. Here is a link to some of his simple genius
A phrase you’ll hear me use around the office frequently with our team is “PLAY OFFENSE” – take the fight to the enemy. That’s what I’m here to do with A Keen Mind.
about 1-2x per week as well.