Monthly Archives: April 2016

HELL YES vs. NO

Hell Yes vs NO

I feel like this post is the most important post I’ve written this year!

Every day, we’re bombarded to make decisions on varying levels of commitment.  Every day, we purchase goods and services. What I learned is every day we waste tremendous amounts of energy and money on the trivial many vs selecting the vital few.

I’m going to paint the concept of HELL YES vs. NO to you in a few different ways.

  1. Time Commitments
  2. Consumption Habits
  3. Talent Investment

Let us start with a simple introduction on what I’m getting at before we jump into the aforementioned scenarios.  The choice of HELL YES vs. NO should feel exactly how it reads.  Say, “HELL YES” out loud.  Do it.  Right now. As if you were excited about something so much you jumped off the couch. Feels good doesn’t it?!?

Alternatively, say the word “NO” with a strong conviction.  Like asking me if I like the Iowa State Cyclones.  No! Not now, not ever.

Here’s the rub. Until a couple years ago, i.e. before I read Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less, very few of my answers or decisions lived in either of these two polar opposite responses.  I was wasting away in the middle. Over committed with mediocre energy on too many things.

If the feeling of saying YES, isn’t 95% or higher. It’s a NO.

If you really want to put to use the ideas I share on this blog, you’re going to have to get very comfortable saying no. No, no, no.  It’s time to get unreasonable with your time and your commitments.  Unreasonable? Why? The reason why is an answer you already know.

If you only have 100% to give, would you rather give it to 3-4 things, or spread it out over 10?  Why then, do so many commit to doing 10 things (extremely mediocre mind you) when they should be saying NO.  In today’s society, if we’re not “busy” we must be lazy.  Wrong answer. It’s window dressing for a false sense of over-involvement equalling progress.  Unfocused action only leads to one thing FAST.  Burnout.

Busy = I lack the ability to prioritize and select the vital few…so I do it all.

Conversely, feel the alternative.  Say, “HELL YES” again out loud. Think about how much more you’ll deliver in a scenario with this amount of passion, focus and creativity. You’ll absolutely crush it, and I’m willing to bet you’ll be happier as a result. Happy because you’re 100% invested.  Happy because you’re not overwhelmed worrying about 10 other things.  Happy because you’ll make huge progress because you have nothing else in your peripheral begging for your focus.

Secondly, let us explore the world of “HELL YES vs. NO” in our consumption habits.  This one is really interesting to me.  A couple years ago i started following Ramit Sethi after reading his book I Will Teach You To Be Rich over a couple flights.  I then started following his blog: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.  He wrote something that really caught my attention about spending.

He makes the wonderful argument about spending lavishly on a vital few things we really want and bring us tremendous joy.

It could be an expensive pair of jeans, or premium shoes for someone.  For another person, it is great meals at posh restaurants because that brings them the most joy. For another, it was all about great travel experiences.  Point is, in each scenario, dialing back on many mediocre purchases, lead to tremendous happiness when big purchases were HELL YES purchases.

My HELL YES, looks very different than yours.  That’s ok!  That’s the point.  Find out what is most important to you and spend there.  But, don’t forget to dial back on all the other pieces that don’t bring you joy.  Save on the trivial, to splurge on the tremendous.

Lastly, let us take a look at talent investment in terms of skill set and time investment. I’ve written about this before and I want to reinforce it with the context provided in this post.

Find the two or three WORLD CLASS talents you have, and go all-in (HELL YES) on them.

Everything else must take a back seat. Remember, 95% commitment or more is a HELL YES.  Everything else is a NO.  When you get to a point where you’re spending most of your day on world class talents, you win.  You’re happy  You’re 10x more likely to gain new opportunities, establish great relationships, and I promise you…you’ll feel better.  You will smile bigger and hug longer.

ACTION ITEM: When met with an opportunity for a decision. Make sure you’re answer passes the HELL YES vs. NO test. No hurt feelings, just a cold hard reality check and understand the consequences if you don’t.  Your success and happiness awaits!!!

Go Get It!

Exposure, Jiu-Jitsu, and Growth

Jiu Jitsu Exposure Growth

Think about the last time you were exposed.

I’m not referring to the last time you were caught slipping out the back door in your undies only to drop a little rubbish in the garbage container in the alley…only to find out the door behind you locked.  Exposed.

Tell you what, think on it, and we’ll come back to this after I give you a little context.

As you know, if you read my blog I’m an avid listener to the Tim Ferriss Show podcast.  Twice in his 100+ episodes of deconstructing world class performance, he’s interviewed Josh Waitzkin (Link to podcast here). Without providing a complete wikipedia reference to Josh in this post, I’ll simply say this and you can click on his name.  Josh is a childhood chess prodigy (the subject of the book Searching for Bobby Fischer: The Father of a Prodigy Observes the World of Chess) a world class martial artist, and all-around brilliant guy (shocker).

In their most recent podcast session, Josh shed light on how he sees exposure leading to world-class performers and inevitable success. He discussed with great detail, how after four tireless rounds of Jiu Jitsu practice, the best, the most focused and driven will look for one more challenge. The toughest guy in the room. Those wanting to be world class, search for the most exhausting matchup even when their tank is empty.

This exposure, Josh says, is where excellence and success live.

The sparing partner looking for a “rest”or an easy matchup as they enter their fifth and final matchup of the day may very well be good. But, they’ll likely never be great, because they aren’t exposed to their true potential when it is needed most.

Think about this through another lens.  How does a muscle grow? I’m not a body builder, but I know it takes one key word. Resistance.

The toughest steel is forged in the hottest fire

Care for another example? There is a wonderful book I read a little over a year ago by Carol Dweck: Mindset: The New Psychology of Success. I highly encourage this reading to anyone who asks me for a recent book recommendation.

To oversimplify Carol’s theory (which is slightly unfair) for the purpose of this conversation on exposure, think about this. Growth focused vs. static mindsets

Are you smart?

We’d all love to answer yes. But Carol would argue the mindset of being “smart” will limit our future success. It is static. So I should be dumb, you’re probably asking? Obviously not. But your mindset should be more focused on growth than static mindsets (static = I’m smart).

Carol expands with research linking kids who were told they were “smart” seemingly struggling when met with a real challenge in the future.  Since the answer isn’t found with relative immediacy, the smart kids tend to give up and feel worse about themselves in the process. Since they can’t figure it out and they’ve always been labeled as “smart”, the antithesis is I’m dumb. Confidence is shattered.

Conversely, the children with a “growth” focused mindset, those with an appetite to learn for the process of learning, were excited & excelled when presented with a really difficult challenge. They didn’t need to be smart to find the answer, but they wouldn’t give up when pursuing multiple solutions when an answer wasn’t immediately available.

The reason the growth focused mindset leads to more successful futures is directly linked to exposure.

Back to the beginning. I read and write frequently about the nature and origins of success. I love the topic and the learnings that come with it. One constant of success across all walks of life is exposure.  Exposure is the oxygen needed to fuel the fire. The people consistently seeking exposure to new challenges, new beliefs, new literature and new data are more often than not winners because they’re not afraid to take the next step in the stairway to success.

ACTION ITEM:  There are few things I love more than winning and a winning mindset.

Get exposed!