Monthly Archives: August 2024

Surviving in a World of Temptation

Temptation is omnipresent and old as time. Documented from the beginning (Genesis 1) with Adam & Eve. It lives within all of us, in a myriad of ways, every day. I personally wrestle with multitudes of temptation. Instead of hiding from it, why not call it what it is? Because if not identified and controlled, it has the power to destroy.

My goal with facing temptation isn’t to be perfect, but to be aware. I’m an imperfect being(just like everyone reading this), and if I believe what I learn in church, my sins are forgiven (Even though that’s oftentimes hard for me to swallow). I’m also keenly aware I have a v-e-r-y addictive personality and know where the danger of temptation tends to lurk in the shadows.

So lets get real. Where does Temptation show up for me? There are so many ways.

  • Gambling – I like to gamble. It’s fun. It gets the blood flowing. I’m also well aware that I could sit at a blackjack table for 20 hours straight and love almost every minute of it. I could bet on a sports event daily…but I don’t because it would become a problem. Small doses tempered with self-aware breaks keep me in line.
  • Online Shopping [Ads for Golf Gear or Jordans]… Yes please!! I’ll have one of each. But I learned long ago while living in Chicago to play the game I like to call, “Do I really need this?” and “Will this really make me happy?” I did this traveling into and out of many stores on the famed Million Dollar Mile. That level of pause usually stops credit card swipe and I move on with my life. Anyone on any social media platform fights this temptation daily with ads. Learning the “power of the pause” and stepping away helps me greatly.
  • Beauty/Lust – I like a tall, athletic, brunette. I should know, I married one. I can also see thousands of them on Instagram along with bikini clad models should I go looking…and I have. Even better, my friends at Meta can amplify this and are great at showing me 10,000 more, should I spend the time. The major problem with this is, none of them will help me with my marriage and none meet reality. Lighting, posing, editing, makeup, all very tempting. None know a single thing about me and provide really no solve to life’s mysteries. These simple reminders help me pause, and hopefully step away.
  • Tobacco – If you’ve followed my chronicles, you know I had a penchant chewing tobacco. I still do actually, but I’m in more control now, not the other way around. That said, if it’s around…I think about it and I’ve slipped up from time to time. I’ve done it as recently this summer. I don’t have to quit forever, I just have to ensure I don’t make a habit of it. If I slip up…forgive and make sure not to replicate tomorrow!!
  • Luxury – I’ve earned the gift of financial resources in my life and that comes with a burden of choice. Many things are available, and a singular purchase wouldn’t burden our family. But reason must enter along with temptation. I’ve written about it many times. A new Rolex? Not yet. A new Audi? Sure…but not now. Although very tempting (to my ego), my life won’t get noticeably better. Only my ego grows and that’s dangerous for someone like me.
  • Alcohol – The older I get, the less I consume. But I’m also learning more and more about my relationship with alcohol and how my body reacts. I’ve heard it said, “alcohol and money, two things that will make you more of what you already are…just bigger and louder!” I also know there’s a slippery slope for me around 3-4 drinks that ends with me likely feeling like garbage the next day. I haven’t “quit” drinking, but I have cut back and I’m better for doing so.
  • Sugar/Poor Diet – This one might seem odd to put on a list of temptation, but if my goal is a healthier body and vitality, poor diet is absolutely the enemy. And this one is REALLY hard as it is soooooo easy to violate nutrition principles multiple times daily. The [Standard American Diet] – SAD as my Dr. at Mayo referred to it, is everywhere!! I’ll enjoy chocolate, and ice cream, and a Dr. Pepper from time to time. I just have to make sure it’s not made routine. Say hello to my good friend moderation!

I listen to Rich Roll and he speaks frequently of his battle with Alcohol and the power of the 12-step recovery. The first principle being, “Admittance he were powerless over alcohol — that his life had become unmanageable.”

The same powerlessness can be said for: Gambling, porn, shopping, lying, sugar, nicotine and the list goes on. Temptation presents itself in a myriad of ways. Maneuvering life alongside temptation requires awareness (not perfection)!

Awareness and Mostly-Good

Perfection in life unattainable. Look at the stories of humankind. Humans have succumb to temptation for thousands of years, and yet…people are mostly good. The bible begins with temptation in Genesis…and still, people are mostly good. Everyone has a vice, and yet…people are mostly good.

Advice

One of the things I pay close attention to on this blog is giving advice. I try NOT to do it at all cost because we’ve all come from such unique backgrounds. I will however, tell you what works for me, or how I think about life. As it relates to temptation, my goal is awareness and admittance. Others might consider this surrender. This awareness “most of the time “allows me to interrupt the temptation signal and pause. From there I can ask myself, “What exactly are you doing here?” Or, “is this really what you want to do and are you prepared to live with the circumstances?” From there, I can progress being mostly-good and I can hope to be forgiven for the rest.

FINAL THOUGHT

No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)

The ONE QUESTION Driving Daily Action

I spend time every single Sunday with focused thought on on trying to answer one question.

Zac…What do you want?

For probably the last 15 years, or in the time since getting married I began being much more intentional about where life would take me. Actually, I take that back, as that speaks to having more control than likely exists. How about, I spent more time thinking about where I’d like to go and thinking it into existence.

  • What was important to me?
  • Where would I live?
  • Would I live extravagantly or frugally?
  • What did I want to do with my time?
  • Who were my close friends?
  • How did I want to feel? (This one is often overlooked)
  • Who were my teachers? Who would I learn from?
  • What would I look like? (Yes, I can be a vain person, but this is part of how I think about spending my time)

Today writing this post I’m 42 years old. Sometimes I can’t believe this, as it feels like yesterday I was 30, with no kids and a few dreams written down on one of my many notebooks. Back then, I wrote down many dream lines to pursue. I wanted to live on a golf course, own a business, sell a business (for profit), create a life of financial freedom, drive a Ferrari (why not right??), and the list goes on.

Having achieved a few of these dreams by 40, my focus shifts as I’ve moved into a new season of life. I find one word driving more of my thoughts and actions more than ever…

FREEDOM

This word plays itself out in a myriad of ways as I think about the 360 degree picture that is life. Below I’ll explain how I’m thinking about FREEDOM. It helps to mention a quote I’ve been loving from retired Navy Seal Jocko Willink. That quote is, “Discipline = Freedom”. The more discipline I can build into my life and follow with determination on the THINGS THAT REALLY MATTER. The more freedom I have in the rest of my life.

Financial Freedom

Financial Freedom: One could easily say I think about this too much, but it’s important to me and part of who I am. I want the ability to not worry about a “paycheck” from an employer. In order to do this, I started asking different questions in my early 30s.

Where would this additional income come from? What would I need to save to be set free? What would I need to own that paid me consistently? How “early” could I really retire? These questions led to study, planning and executing on a strategy to [exit the rat race] as Robert Kiyosaki describes it in Rich Dad Poor Dad. Around 2012 or so, I landed on an aggressive date of 2027. I call it my “Freedom Date”.

The disciplines at play here are relatively simple. Save a great deal more than our expenses (goal 2x or more). Therefore, every months’ income also buys a month of Freedom (or more). I Invest that capital into avenues that produce income or buy time backward from a retirement age of 60. If I’m going to ‘retire’ at 45 in 2027, I need to buy 15 years. To do so, I invest in real estate, have brokerage account with Vanguard, Life Insurance, Roth IRAs, IRA, 401k, high-yield savings account (oxymoron) and business ownership. Some provide monthly cash flow, others are true retirement vehicles.

Physical Freedom

Physical Freedom: This is about vitality and freedom of movement. In Norman Vincent Peale’s book, “The Power of Positive Thinking” the author frequently refers to the power of prayer and its impact on vitality. After all, what good is an early retirement or complete flexibility if it can’t be enjoyed fully? A few years ago I got much more serious about my fitness. During COVID we had a new baby, I was stressed from work, by body was inflamed and I was mentally zapped. I was anxious and my body shuddered at the stress. I needed a physical reset to get back on the path to physical freedom I’d fallen off. Again, “Discipline = Freedom” and my plan was to transform myself via sweat. In late 2021 I invested in a Peloton and boy am I happy we did. But it didn’t start out all roses. The first day I climbed on the bike with ambitions high, my heart rate skyrocketed and a moment of panic hit. I felt weak and ashamed. Was this really my reality? I’ve always been an athlete for God’s sake. But I kept riding and stacking wins. In the three years since I’ve completed nearly 1,000 rides and poured gallons of sweat onto my basement floor (sorry Beth). In the same time, I used this momentum to complete thousands of pull-ups….probably 30,000 in the past 3+ years. I sleep better, my joints feel better, and the outcome is a better looking body. My kids are now 5 & 10, and I need the energy to keep up with them and their endeavors.

Emotional Freedom

Emotional Freedom – In my 30’s I began reading a book titled, “The Daily Stoic” by Ryan Holiday. I like it so much, I’ve gifted it to many friends. The book is composed in a way that each day, the reader digests one page of stoic philosophy from thousands of years ago. One page a day, every day. Not zero. Not two, or twenty. One Page (discipline). The accumulation of pages helped rewire my thinking and I’ll still turn the pages of this classic 10 years later.

Nothing is promised. Nothing is permanent. All we have is the present. When I was younger, I thought a stoic was one who showed no emotion. Ever. Stone faced and emotionless. Reading the stoics, I realized that’s not the case at all. The greatest of the stoics felt ALL THE FEELS. They experienced all the human experience has to offer, but being a stoic meant they had an ability to separate themselves from the emotion and didn’t allow the emotion to overrun their operating system. A stoic can see the situation for exactly what it is, and nothing more.

People will lie or deceive you. You’ll be cheated. Something will be stolen. Hearts will be broken. Sickness will hit. Life presents numerous challenges. The pragmatic approach is, to see it for what it is…nothing more, nothing less. This study helped me mentally in a big way. I’m a world-class grudge holder and can easily get lost in the “story” I tell myself. I’m guilty of holding on too tight and letting that stress live with me too long. The path to emotional Freedom won’t end on a date. It’s a journey that will last a lifetime.

Conclusion

I’ll conclude to say, the items and goals listed above are mine. They are NOT yours nor should they be. Every person must go on the journey of finding out what they want on their own. My only advice is to be sincere in your approach and don’t fake it. You want what you want, and it’s not for someone else. But changing your mind is ok too. It’s quite likely your goals and thinking will evolve over time. They should, we shouldn’t remain static as people as we age and gain knowledge and experiences.

Where Focus Goes, Energy Flows

Tony Robbins