Category Archives: Professional Development

The Value of Playing Up

I can probably tell you when and where it happened.

I was back for only a few of days over Christmas break of my freshman year of college. I was playing basketball at the time and spent the last four months playing with guys who we former all-staters, but were now all-Americans. I was an 18, they were 21 and 22. Big difference. My learning curve was steep.

I played a few pickup games in the time home as was customary over Christmas break. After all, I’m always in the mood to get buckets. But this time something was different. The game had changed. It not only slowed down, but it was just easier as my perspective shifted.

I’m talking BIG change. Not small incremental change.

You ever wonder why the middle or youngest brother turns out to be the REALLY good one? I have zero stats or data to back this up, but I suspect it is true because he spent his entire life “playing up” and getting worked by his older brothers.

Would you like another example?

Things changed drastically in my career when I was 24 and started working with a nationally managed retail organization. Their game and demands elevated what I needed to deliver to continue adding value to the relationship. I quickly began to understand what it took to operate “successfully” at their level, and what expectations came with it. I needed to get better. The good news is, I could see and feel what that looked like.

With all that said, how can you start playing up today?  Or better put, what would that look like?

Here are a few ideas:

  • Get in a room with people better than you. These people have been “there” before.  There = where you want to go!
  • In golf speak, if you shoot in the 70’s you’ve got to run with the guys consistently shooting in the 60’s. Find out how they do it?
  • Are you a director? Get in the room, in a pitch, in a strategy session with a VP or President. How do they think or influence people?
  • Are you an educator looking to be an administrator? Spend time with someone who walked the same path and is a principal.
  • My wife was a good runner. Her suggestion, find a new pace. Find a new group to speed you up! A PR (personal record) awaits.
  • Imagine being a chess prodigy, and sitting with a grand master.
  • Find a new peer group. You ever heard the saying “there’s always another guy with a bigger boat?” Find that guy and who he hangs out with.

Playing up means involving yourself in a new game. A game outside your current comfort zone. Success may or may not come quickly. Embrace the ability to understand where you can improve to play at their “new” level.

Newsflash. You’re going to get knocked back. I’ve had it happen numerous times and I hope it continues. Nothing wrong with a little humility and appreciation for the competition.

It doesn’t mean your current skillset isn’t worthy, or isn’t valuable. It very likely is. It means the pursuit continues.

ACTION ITEM: Get lost in the pursuit of playing up! The rest will come.

I’m Great vs. We Are Great

It’s a natural progression I guess…

I started out in my career like any ambitious 22 year old can. Do the absolute best “I” can, to show others I’m worthy. Looking back there is a great deal of insecurity in this thinking and lifestyle.

I would do whatever it took and wherever it took me to be perceived as great at what I did. I’m really not even sure why, but I could almost say there was a chip on my shoulder. I really don’t know how it even got there… and I’m also not really sure it will ever go away!

I was going to win. For me.

There’s an interesting naiveness to it all. I really didn’t know what I didn’t know. But I was going to PROVE something to someone. I’m convinced looking back now some of this energy was misdirected.

Maybe it’s the competitive nature in me (ok, super competitive). I did what any hyper-competitive young adult would do. I wrote down goals and kept them on my dresser. They consisted of:

  • Become the youngest Account Executive the company ever had (by 24)
  • Make $100,000 in annual income (as that’s what the big boys were making…so I thought )
  • Sell a BIG client on my own. (Thinking back who was going to commit a $1 million/year to a 24 year old who looked 18? Didn’t matter)

I achieved them all. Somehow I had it figured out. <Insert chest pounding after scoring a TD dance>

In hindsight, I really didn’t know anything.

Fast forward 15 years and I now spend a great deal of time thinking about being the tide vs. the boat (a high tide raises all ships). I’ve also grown much more self aware in the process.

In my 20’s, my confidence was inflated…as young men in their 20’s usually are. Any confidence I have today is the result of truly understanding WHO I am, and who I am not. No easy journey on that path. I’ve had a lot of people help me with this along the way and appreciate their honesty and intrepid spirit to share candidly what could only make me better as a person, friend, leader, parent, father, or husband.

I’m starting to think a great deal more about legacy and a vision for the future both personally and professionally. Legacy is a great beacon for where our decisions will take us.

Looking back on my career I’ve experienced many wins. I’m positive there will be many many more. After all, 40 is still a long ways away!

But those individual wins aren’t the most fulfilling. I smile ear to ear thinking back to times I’ve seen others win. Big wins. Personal breakthroughs. Team wins. People stepping out of their comfort zone to contribute. Those scenarios truly FILL me up with gratitude.

No doubt I’ll continue to work on myself and getting every ounce of talent I can out of my abilities. I’m wired this way and shutting it off would be equivalent to asking a fish to stop swimming.

To add one last bit of color to this post, I’d like to clarify the “We” of this framework. We isn’t only my Mindstream Media team at work, although it is important we continue to grow and succeed together. It’s my family and friends. My peer group. Community leaders I’m fortunate enough to work with. We need to be great!

ACTION ITEM: More valuable that WE are great, vs. I’m Great.

 

Hanging on Too Tight

I was listening to a podcast last week with Tim Ferriss as he interviewed Cindy Whitehead. Here is the link. Cindy is well known for selling two pharmaceutical companies for over one billion dollars and is now dedicating her time to helping other female entrepreneurs pursue their mission.

In the middle of the episode the two are discussing negotiating tactics to win when the stakes are at their highest. Want to know “the secret” to winning?

He who cares the least, wins!

Sounds too simple right. So maybe the answer is to just care about nothing, and float aimlessly through life living like a true nihilist? Hardly. Caring the least is largely about perspective and what you are willing to lose.

In golf, one of the first things an instructor will likely teach you is the grip. Not so much the interlocking grip vs. the overlap vs. the ole baseball grip. No. I’m referring to grip pressure. Tight enough to maneuver the club, but not so loose that you lose the grip and it slips out of your hands on the range and goes flying toward that old woman in the visor. That’s dangerous. Strangling the air out of the grip doesn’t help either. Wringing the club’s neck with tension will lead to lack of flow with the swing and makes it nearly impossible to release the club head and really generate power.

Two very important words there. Flow and Release.

I can name a handful of times in my life when I’ve been hanging on much too tight. That’s called nerves, or the more commonly uttered phrase today: anxiety. For me it is usually the result of trying too hard to drive an outcome likely out of my control, but one I believe NEEDS it to happen. I also become less of my true self in the process. I’ve seen it. I’ve felt it.

Pressure Balance

I’ve hung on too tight countless times in sports, with relationships, business pursuits and in my professional life. I’m pretty sure each delivered a less than desirable outcome because I wasn’t playing my game. I was playing too tight, trying to guide every outcome.

Feels like being a little league pitcher who can’t throw a strike after walking the bases loaded. All you want to do is aim the ball over the plate and have it hit the target. You’d give almost anything to make it happen and squeeze the ball with this intent. Meanwhile, the coach from the dugout yells, “don’t aim it Zac…just throw!” He’s right.  Just throw and let it go!

Hanging in there vs. Hanging on.

That’s life isn’t it? Hanging in there just enough to pursue a lofty goal just out of our reach, but not willing to give up just yet. Conversely, not hanging on so desperately so that when it doesn’t happen the result is fatal and personal catastrophe ensues.

Anyone who’s spent any time with a child knows exactly what this pressure looks like. Devastation occurs when a child doesn’t get their way or their demands are not met. We’ve all seen the temper tantrum thrown at the toy isle in Target. These are children, but I could source many events where adults don’t act all too different.

What does holding on too tight feel like?

To me, it feels like pressure. A weight vest. The game doesn’t slow down, it speeds up. Decision making isn’t as sharp as it should be. I’m pressing, pressing, pressing for the outcome. Minutes feel like hours. Days like months. There is absolutely no flow. It’s mentally and physically exhausting because when one element doesn’t hit the way the script in my head reads, it’s like a kick to the gut. Body blow, body blow…complete loss of wind. The answer feels like more effort. More hours. More grind.

Burnout.

I’ve been there a few times and usually spot it later than I’d like, but that’s not the worst thing. The key is being able to spot it. What follows is usually a deep sense of clarity, gratitude and ability to refocus on the important stuff. Focus on the “right” action, results will come. Getting lost again in the process has always worked for me.

Focus on Action > Results

If you feel yourself hanging on too tight what do you do? My recommendation is to get very honest with yourself and fear set. What is fear setting? Here is a link to Tim’s blog post on Fear Setting. Name your fears. Speak them out loud or write them down. Let your fear hit oxygen and assign value to them. Is this real? If so, what is the worst outcome? Will you die from this?

ACTION ITEM:

The quality of your life is in direct reflection to the quality of your questions. Here are a few different ways to think about hanging on too tight.

  • Why am I hanging on so tight?
  • Who am I trying to impress?
  • What is it I’m really chasing?
  • How will my life really change if said outcome does or doesn’t happen?
  • Could all the time and energy I’m directing at making this one thing happen, be better used to pursue multiple opportunities instead?

 

My Life Reflects My Intention

Anything I have, or don’t have in my life, is a reflection of my intentions. Intention can be manifested as action or inaction.

  • Friendships
  • Spouse
  • Curiosity
  • Intelligence
  • Business & Career
  • Financial Situation
  • Fitness Level/Body Composition
  • Housing Situation
  • Spiritual Place
  • and on and on

No one else’s fault. No one else’s dreams.

100% MINE.

If you don’t have what you want…that’s on you. As stated, your intentions manifest themselves every day. You have exactly what you’ve intended to have. Nothing more, nothing less.

Here’s the thing to understand. I don’t have it all figured out. Actually far from it. But I have been able to change my intentions and outcomes over time. I’m doing it today!

Now here’s the crux…if you don’t have what you want, how do you change it?

QUESTIONS. Ask better questions.

The quality of your life, is reflected by the quality of your questions.

Change the question, change the angle, change the outcome.

ACTION ITEMS: Better questions lead to better reflections. Better reflection leads to changing your intention.

 

 

Eat at the Diner of Your Thoughts

You ever have that challenge staring you in the face and you can’t seem to see it any other way? Problems are many, solutions are few.

Impending doom sets in.

Our thoughts have a way of owning us. Our thoughts drive our actions and even the intentions for those actions. At times, you may feel powerless over them. In all likelihood, we are.
All the great thinkers in history carried with them the great ability to separate, or have a seemingly out of body experience with their thoughts. A freedom to look at their challenge from the outside, free of tension, anxiety, and pressures of the moment.
This isn’t easy to do.
But that doesn’t make it impossible, does it?

Would you eat at the diner of your own thoughts?

Let me set the scene…
You’re standing outside…probably in the rain. It’s always in the rain isn’t it? Not a downpour, but a gentle, annoying, cool, but not cold drizzle.
The rain is context for making it a little harder to see things completely clearly. If this moment in life were the weather, the forecast would be a gray dreary rain settling in for the foreseeable future.

Do you see him standing outside? What is he looking at?

He sees this lonely soul, nestled cozily into a booth at one of those 24/7 diners, caressing a luke-warm cup of black coffee. You know this kind of diner, the kind with the quintessential neon [OPEN] sign in the front door. The coffee is just ok, but at least it’s warm…and the pie is taunting you.

Do you see him?

He’s there, lost in thought, or maybe buried in a world of problems, regrets and uncertainty. More than anything he’s looking for one of two things.
  1. Answers
  2. Courage

Who is this person?

It’s me. Both actually, are me.

I’m the guy standing out in the rain, and the guy in the restaurant represents my thoughts.
This odd exercise and viewpoint helps me see what can’t be observed otherwise. It provides separation from the dangerous feedback loop of my own thoughts.

You ever have a friend ask you for advice?

I sure have. Many times. The answers come rolling off my tongue rapid fire, like tennis balls from one of those sick American Gladiators guns. Man those were awesome! Bang Bang Bang. Idea, idea, idea. Each a solution.
Point is, it’s not MY problem when my friend asks for advice. It’s my friends’, therefore my answers carry zero weight or anxiety. It’s not my life. I’m simply providing direction and logic.
This is the answer.

Separation.

If you can’t dine at the restaurant of your own thoughts, you can’t change the angle of looking at your challenge, or opportunity for that matter. See it for exactly what it is, but never more than it is. I think my friend Tony Robbins said that. [digital fist bump Tony]
ACTION ITEM: 
In solitude (a walk, a quiet room, a flight) I don’t care where, get alone and outside yourself. Joe Rogan says, “be the super hero of your own movie. What would he do?” Play it out and be the hero!
If nothing else, sit quietly in the diner and enjoy a slice of pie.
This too shall pass.

Power of Pattern Interrupt

Patterns.

Every day, you get up at 6am.

Every day, you show up at  to the office at 7:59am, and leave at 4:59pm (yup, one minute early!) STICK IT TO THE MAN!

Every day, you eat the same thing for lunch.

Every meeting…is in the same office.

Every day, you drive the same exact way to work, and the same exact way home.

Every night at precisely 6:30pm, you sink deeper into the couch…zoning out.

Deep in Pattern.

STUCK. BORED.

Keep in mind. None of what I’m outlining above constitutes laziness. It may, but it very well may not. There are many motivated people doing the same thing every day… but in pursuit, not experiencing major changes in results.

It’s time to pattern interrupt.

I have this wonderful obligation, partly, this is my job. Travel, is one pattern interrupt. I Live in Iowa, but travel to: NYC, travel to San Diego, off to Dallas, then Florida. Now Las Vegas and then San Francisco. Doesn’t really matter where. As Jimmy Buffett says, “Changes in latitude, changes in attitude.”

Each is a new opportunity, and not necessarily a business opportunity (although that usually exists on the surface). It’s an opportunity for pattern interrupt. New scenery. New faces to meet. New points of view to engage and debate.

Put quite simply, a new (or newer) look at the world around us. Or at least a new way to see it. If you’ve ever flown, think about the freedom you feel looking out seat 14A. Peering down 10,000 feet as the plane roars toward the clouds. The people become specks. Cars become micro machines. Buildings are well thought out LEGO configurations. Suddenly you can see EVERYTHING. The prism of God’s creation right in front of you.

NEWSFLASH, you don’t need to spend $1,000 on a plane ticket to Europe to pattern interrupt.

  • You can go for a long walk, when you pattern is to sit down after breakfast or dinner.
  • Ask your boss if you can work “remotely” for the afternoon. Same work, fresh location. Fresh perspective.
  • Instead of eating lunch alone like most days, engage a long-time friend for some thoughtful discussion.
  • Chose writing in a journal for 20 minutes for a break between binge watching episodes of Ozark
  • You can venture to a Starbucks, or a Panera to people watch, and literally THINK.
  • If you live in Dallas, hit up Austin for the weekend. Talk to a stranger

I literally started writing this from a Panera, because I needed some new scenery to explore this thought. Nothing major, but yet, still different from the island in my kitchen (where much of the magic happens ;-).

How can you think about pattern interrupt today?

The holidays provide a built-in [pattern interrupt] scenario. Many of us will have a day, or days, and maybe even a couple of weeks off.

Yes, please take your foot off the gas…but not too far, lest losing all the stream and momentum built up over 2017. See where you fall into pattern ruts, and where you can build in “interruptions” to your 2018.

Merry Christmas!

 

Personal Value & Personality Flaws

I have a personality flaw.

Ok, let me be honest with the church here…I have many. That said, one I’m noticing more and more is the connection of my business and personal life, based on RESULTS. Join me, if you will, on this flow of consciousness

If the business is good and successful, life is good. Life is great! But this can also lead to an over-inflated sense of SELF. Not the direction I’m looking for.

If the business isn’t going the way I want it to (how could such a thing happen?!?!?), I reflect it personally. Beating myself up over every detail. As you can probably understand, this event, or ebb and flow, happens many times over the days, weeks, and years. I’m only starting to rationalize with it more now after reflecting back.

I figured I write so often about personal improvement, mindset, and strategies to be more successful, I didn’t want the audience thinking I’m without fault or flaw. It’s probably just the opposite.

But the internet isn’t a place for that really is it?

The social sharing world of today is “filtered” – literally. I’m great. We’re great. Look at where we are!! We see only the 5% of what people want us to see.

Well, here’s where I am, and it comes from a position of vulnerability.

There is so much happening to the world largely out of my control. I need to get better at not letting it impact my day-to-day, and week-to-week attitude. Good or bad. Control what can be controlled.  The rest…just happens.

Our society is in a speed it up, speed it up race. Same goes for results. Get in, or get out…and even when you’re in, it is only “what have you done for me lately,” get in. Then you’re —–> OUT.

<Insert Suggestions from the audience>  How does one get better at this?

Here’s what I can say. I’m getting more in tune with loving THE PROCESS. Nick Saban preaches it daily with his Alabama football program. Here is a terrific excerpt from a Business Insider article,

 “The players would concentrate only on winning those seconds, take a rest between plays, then do it all over again. There would be no focus at all on the scoreboard or on the end results.”

This Business Insider video on the Samurai Process is a wonderful follow up to Saban’s focus on the process.

It’s working every rep, every drill, finishing every practice in athletics. It’s about the every day efforts leading up to the collective wins in mass. Doing the work with championship consistency and letting the results speak for themselves.

My thought on this is simple. If all I (or anyone) ever focused on is the final result, the end feeling will be extremely empty. Even if the wins largely outweigh the losses. I liken it to having an endless appetite and no meal will fill the emptiness that exists. Just keep eating.

No matter what, when you’re wired like I am, no amount of winning will never be enough, and losses all suck. Really really suck. There is a massive lack of appreciation there.

This is not where happiness and thriving live.

The greats. The pros. The all-timers. All were in love with the process. It’s the only thing keeping them from quitting, when the results inevitably don’t go their way, or the flip side…when they’ve been to the mountain top, and still search for more.

ACTION ITEM: This one’s on me. I’m working on my mindset. I’m working on loosening the connection. Work in progress.

Thanks for listening.

Saving Money Vs. Buying Time

Last week I was listening to Ryan Daniel Moran’s Freedom Fast Lane podcast while working out. I’m a newer listener, but was drawn in by the guest, the Shark, Robert Herjavec. Link to episode here. The episode is ALL about growth in business!

It was a terrific show, and as with most things, there was one key takeaway that truly STUCK OUT. Mine was the following quote from Robert…maybe 2/3 of the way through the show.

“Poor people, try to save money…Rich People, try to BUY TIME”

I’d like you to read this a time or twelve. I’m not kidding. Think about it. I think I rewound the episode 4x, just to brand these words into my brain.

Look past the obvious. Of course, Robert isn’t saying you should never save. Everything I’ve ever read from multiple financial experts says you should have 3-6 months of living expenses saved for “just-in-case” scenarios. Maybe 12 if you’re extremely conservative.

Focus on the second part. Rich people, try to BUY TIME.

How do they do that? What else does time imply, and how do you BUY IT?

Time = Freedom

How does one “purchase” freedom? Here is a short list.

If you’ve really got the bug, I’d also dive head first into The 4-Hour Workweek: Escape 9-5, Live Anywhere, and Join the New Rich – Tim Ferriss explains “Buying Time” in his book as T.M.I – Target Monthly Income.  What cashflow is needed to “free” yourself from the day-to-day through management of a business. To me, this is the essence of “Buying Time.”

This may not be for everyone, and that is 100% O.K. If it is for you, and you’re really serious about this mission…

Get used to doing what I’m doing, and ask yourself this question.

Are you trying to SAVE MONEY, or are you trying to BUY TIME?

Happy Holidays!

Quest for Pragmatism

What are you searching for?

Are you looking for an answer?

I believe everyone is looking for something! Human existence revolves around finding progress somewhere in our life. The human mind doesn’t allow anyone to remain stagnant, or satisfied…for that matter. Our 2,000+ year old brain is always searching. We used to search for food, now we search to solve problems.

You may be searching for: better physical shape, searching to quit a habit, a bigger income, a MUCH bigger income, more freedom at the office, a better relationship, another job entirely, a better business, and the list goes on forever.

Here’s the thing…I’m looking too. Every day!

Insert pragmatism. The answer to what we’re all looking for is simple. It ALWAYS is. The reason it’s simple, there is nearly a 100% chance, what you’re looking to do or solve for, someone else has already done it.

That said, the effort may not be EASY, but that doesn’t change the answer does it?

Answers are simple. Action tends to be the hard part.

Here is a rundown, a short list, of what millions are looking for at this very moment…and pragmatic answers to each challenge.

  1. Lose Weight – stop eating shit and get to a gym 4-5x a week. Simple
  2. Quit Smoking – Commit to NOT lighting the next cigarette. Simple. Yet millions have proven…not easy.
  3. A New Job – Get serious about letting people know your value and get committed on finding something new, or somewhere new. AKA – commit and try. Simple.
  4. More Money – Get a second Job. Whoa… you mean more work?  Answer is simple isn’t it?
  5. More Money at my “current” job – tell your boss. What do you want, and how do you intend to deliver the value to cash the check back to your employer?  I’d also associate a timeline. Raises NEVER come at the expense of the employer. Not an employer planning to stay in business.

Just because you don’t like the answer, or it isn’t comfortable, doesn’t mean the answer gets to change. Feelings take a back seat to a truly pragmatic view. It’s commitment and RESULTS we’re after.

Less think. More do.

I learned this practice a great deal from previous owners I worked for (thank you if you’re reading this) and most recently from my partners.

If you’re not getting what you want, in anything, you MUST change it…or suffer the consequences. The consequences will likely hurt much more in the long run if you delay.

Lastly, the pragmatic and the popular don’t often coincide. I feel as though they’re almost opposite sides of a magnet pushing against one another resisting connection.

As I continue to read, listen to, and digest the best and brightest leaders, entrepreneurs and thinkers of yesterday and today, most, if not ALL are ruthlessly pragmatic.

Read: The Obstacle Is the Way: The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph

Reflective. Simple. Authentic. Action-oriented.

ACTION ITEM: A shift toward the pragmatic. Simple answers…not easily achieved. In the end, it is up to you. It always has been. Maybe you just needed to cut through the bullshit.

 

The “Right” Selfish

I have many personality flaws. One is I can be selfish from time to time.

WIIFM – What’s in it for me?

It’s one flaw I’m working on…embracing. This may sound odd on the surface, but stay with me.

Most addicts learn the Serenity Prayer. Oddly enough, I think it has tremendous relevance here.

Many have heard part one:

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference

Most have not heard/read the second half:

Living one day at a time;
enjoying one moment at a time;
accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
that I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
forever in the next.
Amen

What does this have to do with me being selfish?

It has everything to do with it. It means embracing my flaws, and instead of beating myself up for it and trying to find a person I’m not, or perfection, finding ways to better channel this behavior to benefit others.

Here are some real-world examples where this feeling and post came to life.

CHURCH: The #1 reason I like going to church is, it makes ME feel better. It makes ME a better person. It is one hour of alone time for ME and my wife. It causes ME to slow down and reflect. Some people may have a big problem with this. I get it. However, I’m not going to tell you what you want to hear. This is how I feel.

Secondarily, I get more involved with others I don’t usually see when I’m there. I get to give back and get involved outside of my day-to-day life.  Selfishly, I need to get there more often.

GIFT GIVING: There are few things that make ME happier than giving someone else a gift. It makes ME feel good, making them feel good. I’m okay with giving more gifts. I’m helping two instead of just one.  Once again, you don’t have to like this…but it sure feels right to me.  Selfishly, I need to give more.

DONATING TIME/RESOURCES: I love talking shop, business ideas, business strategy or just ways to help others make money or better their lives. It gets my brain working without the constraints of “what should I charge?” for this time and ignites my passions. I really love it.  It’s the #1 reason for this blog. Helping others without expecting anything in return. But that’s a lie. I do expect something. Feedback.

The feeling I get when someone tells me something they read on this blog is impacting their life, or resulted in a BIG WIN…remarkable.

Remarkable

Selfishly, I need to reach out to others more.

This is an odd post for (once again) me. It’s not something I can even remotely think impacts your thoughts or your life as a reader, and that’s ok. Maybe this will stick. We all have our flaws. Instead of turning it into a fault forever, find a way to flourish in it’s existence.

Selfish yes. But, the RIGHT SELFISH. At least in my eyes.

ACTION ITEM: “I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.” ― Augusten Burroughs, Magical Thinking