It’s Oct. 5th. 4:11AM. I’m wide awake.

Not by choice either. At 3:15AM I woke to take down the second (yes there are two) dose of laxative that would further empty my body out before my 7:45AM colonoscopy. I get one every other year due to my Ulcerative Colitis. At this point in the early morning “prep” process, there is literally [nothing left] in my body.

I haven’t eaten in roughly 34 hours…and oddly enough, I’m very alert and rather focused. My mind feels sharp and I’m not even thinking of food. I just banged one last cup of coffee for a little jolt of energy this morning pre procedure. Funny what happens when we go without food for an extended period of time. The mind and body adapt. I’ve also done this before, so mentally I’m prepared for the entire process.

This will be my sixth colonoscopy and by now, it’s become quite a simple method to follow:

• Stop eating for 24 hours+
• Consume laxative doses and empty every last bit of substance from my body
• Go to the Dr. Office, Get IV
• Lay on left side & Take a 2-hour nap during procedure

I’m actually laughing to myself sitting up in bed as I think about this. It’s become somewhat “normal” for me every two years. Normal in the fact that, I know what to expect. In a really weird way, it also makes me appreciate what the body and mind are capable of adapting to. Think about this.

• How hard is a marathon for a first timer? How does that compare to the mindset of someone who completed 20?
• How hard is it to go without breakfast? How does this compare to someone who intermittent fasts 16-18 hours every day?
• How hard is it to lose 10lbs.? How does this compare to a wrestler or fighter who does this on the regular?
• How shocking is the “prep” for your 1st colonoscopy? How does this compare to a person going into his sixth?

With Perspective and Frequency, We Adapt

This whole process makes me think about the mind and body’s ability to adapt. But adaptation only comes once we choke down the 1st, big, fearful dose.

I look back at when I started riding my Peloton in the early winter months of 2021. The stats, the output, the rides…they’re laughable now (700 rides later). But I needed a jolt to get back into shape and lead a healthier lifestyle after the COVID lockdowns. Those first few rides, my pulse spiked along with my anxiety, because my body at the time couldn’t tell the difference between heartrate from panic and exercise. Now I’m programmed to jump on, ride like hell, sweat, and leave feeling accomplished and refreshed.

It’s Going to Suck

In her book, Bird by Bird, author Anne Lamott introduces the concept of “shitty first drafts”

All good writers write them. This is how they end up with good second drafts and terrific third drafts.

In any new endeavor, you’re very likely going to suck, or at least stumble along like you’re wearing two left shoes, and that’s OK. I’m trying to teach this to my son, but I’ll admit I struggle with this too. No one wants to look stupid! As for my son, he wants to be “good” at something immediately, but his young brain hasn’t quite learned that it takes work and effort and practice to refine a skill. Who am I kidding, I’m 41 and I’m starting to grasp it now!!! I WANT INSTANT RESULTS.

Cheers to Firsts!!

How did I get from writing about a colonoscopy adventure to thinking about mindset? I don’t know exactly, but I’m energized about the idea of taking on new things, because the second go at the effort will be better, smoother, and less anxious. The biggest tragedy will be never starting in the first place.

Do the first rep. Take the first jog. Eat the first smoothie. Mediate in the most shitty of ways. Write the first sentence. Make the first offer. The second step will surely be less daunting than the first.

If you needed more motivation, I stumbled upon this video coming out of my colonoscopy anesthesia and I’m happy I did:

Oh and do me a favor if you’re in your 40s or certainly 50s. Get a colonoscopy. It won’t kill you, and you can reposition it in your mind as a mental exercise (that could also save your life).