The “Right” Selfish

I have many personality flaws. One is I can be selfish from time to time.

WIIFM – What’s in it for me?

It’s one flaw I’m working on…embracing. This may sound odd on the surface, but stay with me.

Most addicts learn the Serenity Prayer. Oddly enough, I think it has tremendous relevance here.

Many have heard part one:

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference

Most have not heard/read the second half:

Living one day at a time;
enjoying one moment at a time;
accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
that I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
forever in the next.
Amen

What does this have to do with me being selfish?

It has everything to do with it. It means embracing my flaws, and instead of beating myself up for it and trying to find a person I’m not, or perfection, finding ways to better channel this behavior to benefit others.

Here are some real-world examples where this feeling and post came to life.

CHURCH: The #1 reason I like going to church is, it makes ME feel better. It makes ME a better person. It is one hour of alone time for ME and my wife. It causes ME to slow down and reflect. Some people may have a big problem with this. I get it. However, I’m not going to tell you what you want to hear. This is how I feel.

Secondarily, I get more involved with others I don’t usually see when I’m there. I get to give back and get involved outside of my day-to-day life.  Selfishly, I need to get there more often.

GIFT GIVING: There are few things that make ME happier than giving someone else a gift. It makes ME feel good, making them feel good. I’m okay with giving more gifts. I’m helping two instead of just one.  Once again, you don’t have to like this…but it sure feels right to me.  Selfishly, I need to give more.

DONATING TIME/RESOURCES: I love talking shop, business ideas, business strategy or just ways to help others make money or better their lives. It gets my brain working without the constraints of “what should I charge?” for this time and ignites my passions. I really love it.  It’s the #1 reason for this blog. Helping others without expecting anything in return. But that’s a lie. I do expect something. Feedback.

The feeling I get when someone tells me something they read on this blog is impacting their life, or resulted in a BIG WIN…remarkable.

Remarkable

Selfishly, I need to reach out to others more.

This is an odd post for (once again) me. It’s not something I can even remotely think impacts your thoughts or your life as a reader, and that’s ok. Maybe this will stick. We all have our flaws. Instead of turning it into a fault forever, find a way to flourish in it’s existence.

Selfish yes. But, the RIGHT SELFISH. At least in my eyes.

ACTION ITEM: “I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.” ― Augusten BurroughsMagical Thinking

 

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