How Will You Arrive?

Fresh off a 5K run. Drenched in sweat and about to text my buddy Steve.

As the sun rises and the sun sets, I step closer and closer to that milestone birthday I once dreaded and made fun of in my 20s. Now as this milestone quickly approaches, I’m hopeful to believe life is less than half complete. Yes I’ll confess my age. I’m on the doorstep of 40!

What inevitability awaits is marketed to us on the daily. Do gray hairs now populate my head and beard? Could the waistline be slightly expanding? Is my club head speed beginning to deteriorate?

A couple months back around the holidays I was texting with a good friend of mine after a workout. Sweaty, but feeling energized from my recent accomplishment pounding the treadmill for a few miles I reminded him of the impending doom on our horizon. Our 40th birthdays would both come calling in March of 2022.

The question wasn’t if we’d make it to the milestone. No. We were certainly on a crash course with a “mid-life” encounter. The question I posed to him was, “How will we arrive at 40?”

How would I arrive for my wife?

Would I have the vitality necessary to keep a 20-year relationship fun and strong? Would I be desirable in my life choices or is the beer gut winning out? Am I doing my best to balance being a provider, a parent and a partner?

How would we arrive for my kids?

Would we have the energy, or more than enough energy to keep up with them as they grow out of babies into their adolescent years? Do we own enough discipline to know when to put work away and pickup a ball or book with our kids?

How would we arrive for ourselves?

How is our physical, mental and spiritual health at a time when we’re pulled in so many directions? Are we continuing to take on new and curious challenges to keep growing as individuals? Do we also own a deep gratitude to know we are “enough” today?

How would we arrive for our friends?

Are we someone a friend can trust or count on in a time of need? Or are we the one who seldom returns a call or text? Instead choosing the lazy route of disappearing into the ether of a “busy” life void of the connections we truly cherish?

A decade ago…

I shared somewhat similar and more surface level thoughts about this topic as I was nearing 30 and trying (unsuccessfully at the time) to start a family. Was I the reason my wife and I were unable to conceive? Was it my lifestyle that needed an overhaul? If we were blessed with kids, how would I arrive as a parent?

Time is a wonderful teacher. Ten years and a lot of life in between offer more perspective and more thoughtful reflection as I continue on this journey called life.

I now understand life is consistently presenting us with milestones. Each milestone contains a mini finish line on the horizon. Each finish line provides an opportune time time to ask, “How will I arrive when I break the tape of _______________ life event?

If you currently find yourself addicted, overweight, out of shape, anxious, or simply less than your best self…look forward to your next milestone and leverage the journey ahead for meaningful progress.

I don’t care if you’re soon to be graduating college, turning 30, welcoming your first child, turning 50, or soon to be 80 years young. Life is giving us all the opportunity to pause and take stock. Not that we are perfect or in pursuit of perfection. But that we HAVE ARRIVED!

HOW WILL YOU ARRIVE?

Smashing January’s Scorecard

What a terrific start to the year!

What gets measured, gets managed ~ Peter Drucker

January 2022 started off sulking my Iowa Hawkeyes bowl loss on New Year’s Day with a few icy blue Coors Lights. Alas, the next day I started dry January (a day late) with a renewed purpose and new goal pursuits for the new year.

If there’s a word I’m really leaning into for this year it is CONSISTENCY. I think the image below sums up it up pretty well. Less of the left…more of what’s on the right. [Relying on Motivation vs. Consistency]

Moreover, when I’m operating more on the right…I find rhythm. This leads to momentum and I’m ALL FOR steering momentum vs. trying to generate it from a dead stop. I wrapped up 2021 completing over 5,500 pull ups (with a goal of 3,650) and I’m hoping to continue the momentum from the back half of last year into 2022 (already at 1,100+).

My SCORECARD is about vitality metrics. It’s not a specific workout or calorie counting exercise. It’s about momentum, feeling good and the power of a great night of sleep (even when my 3 year old comes in from time to time).

Below are the elements I believe helped me generate and maintain a ton of momentum in January and ultimately led me to crush my goals.

January 2022 Momentum:

  • Consistency – Simple as it sounds, daily work and focus wins out. Even if it’s just a little bit. Not trying to over do it and win the war in a day. Showing up for battle after battle produces progress. Progress leads to momentum – – – – > Forward
  • Peloton – We invested in a Peloton in 2021 and I’m loving it. I booked 20+ rides in January. What else are you going to do when it’s -20 and dark outside? It’s a terrific sweat and something I honestly didn’t think I’d be so into. So far I’m partnering the rides with their meditation classes, which I think are REALLY solid.
  • Dry January – This has been a really good reset for my body. I don’t think I’ll be giving up alcohol indefinitely, but I will be paying more and more attention to how it makes me feel and also the impact on sleep.
  • Sleep – I’ve mentioned this before in a previous post. Sleep is the ultimate lever for how I feel. I do think alcohol is playing a role here to the point above. I’ll also add that if I meditate, stretch, or a combo of both before bed, a great night of sleep is almost certain to follow. As are some crazy vivid dreams!
  • Wim Hof Method – I’ve been sprinkling in Wim Hof Method breathing exercises with my meditation practice. Here is a quick YouTube link to a beginner session (it’s only 11:00). And yes, I’ve also started ending my morning shower with a couple mins of cold, COLD water. I guess I’m a sucker for self-improvement.
  • Checking ALL the Boxes – I’ll reiterate, my scorecard is about creating and maintaining VITALITY in life. Success breeds success. Hitting stride in one platform, leads to progress in another. Fitness + Spiritual + Knowledge.

Finding Momentum in February

As January comes to a close and we wave goodbye to frigid temperatures, there is a good chance many are also waving goodbye to well thought out “New Years Resolutions” promised just 30 days ago. So What!!! Inaction finds us all. Flush it and move on. Don’t dwell.

I beg of you, I implore you, start February anew and find progress in the smallest effort in the right direction. Look to the image above from Liz Fosslien and embrace this. Everyone starts at the bottom left stair. Everyone.

Content Consumed in January:

  1. Finding Ultra (Rich Roll)- Audiobook
  2. Stories That Stick (Kindra Hall) – hard copy
  3. Orchard Hill Church sermon – Family Feelings: Shame (Alice Shirey)
  4. Orchard Hill Church sermon – Family Feelings: Fear (Doug Tensen)
  5. Orchard Hill Church sermon – Family Feelings: Disappointment (Dave Bartlett)